Sunday, May 31, 2009 Just who are they matching with whom?

In the sidebar on, there are often advertisements with looping videos of men or women acting cute/sexy while supposedly chatting with someone online via web cam. They are meant to be enticing.... As though to say "Hey, you can meet these kind of sexy, attractive people on our website right now! Come check it out!" Now, I will get to the point of my blog in a moment, but first, I want to give you a little information about, on the home page of their website, has this to say:

ONLINE DATING AT MATCH.COM "Every year, hundreds of thousands of people find love on pioneered the Internet dating industry, launching in 1995 what is now the most recognized dating service worldwide, and today serves more than 15 million singles in 37 countries. And, as an undisputable leader in the industry, continues to redefine the way single men and single women meet, flirt, date and fall in love.......


Who's on Your neighbors, coworkers and more than 15 million singles worldwide. Every day, more than 60,000 new singles join our growing community. members form a diverse, global community of singles who share common goals - to meet other singles, find dates, form romantic relationships and meet life partners. Young and old alike, gay and straight, from everywhere around the world, singles come to to flirt, meet, date, have fun, fall in love and to form meaningful, loving relationships."

And Glamour magazine had this to say:" is like Baskin-Robbins' 31 flavors: blondes, redheads, Egyptians and probably a set of Siamese twins if you were to search long enough."Now, I am not sure just who is trying to match with whom, perhaps conjoined twins are hot for Egyptians right now....

I would like you to take a look at this screen shot of the most recent advertisement on and tell me who you think they are trying to match up with this person...

She looks to be in about the 12-14 year old range. The video loop features her squinting at the screen, smiling bashfully, flipping her hair back, and tilting her head coyly to the side and giggling to herself. The advertisement beckons you to "See who's online near you".What I would like to know is, why is the "Baskin Robbin's" of the dating websites, advertising "under-age teen girl" as one of it's 31 flavors?

Oh, To Be A Cat.

Oh, to be a cat but feel like a lion; to have the world as your oyster and spend your days napping in the sun; to be center of your own universe, and have all your world and life revolve around yourself; how would it be?
My cat is the most confident and self-assured person I know. She stalks shadows and toys around my apartment like a lion on the plains of Africa. She knows that she is important and never questions my love for her. She never hesitates to ask for what she wants or needs, even though I am not always adept at understanding her. If she wants space, she doesn't yell at me or push me away. She simply goes to a different area of the house and relaxes until she is ready to see me again.

My cat loves passionately and fully. She does not wait around for others to love her. She gives her love, confident that in giving love she will receive love in return. She asks for love gently and sweetly but also boldly and assuredly. If she needs attention from me, she makes it known and then waits patiently for me to give to her. If I am too busy and shoo her away, she doesn't take it personally. She simply finds something else to do. She is comfortable sitting on the chair on the other side of the living room away from me because physical distance does not remove the bond she has to me.

My cat does things just because they are fun without a single thought of what I or anyone else will think of her. She attacks my toes in the middle of the night because they are little people to play with while the big people are sleeping. She runs through the house, joyfully and excitedly, playing tag with shadows on the ceiling. She doesn't care who is watching or what they think of her. She doesn't care if someone sees her run into the glass door or slide across the hard floor awkwardly. She digs in my houseplants because she enjoys it, regardless of what I say to her. Her motto seems to be: It's fun. Who cares?

When a person is described as "cat-like", it conjures up ideas of that person being independent and withdrawn, stealthy, aloof and/or standoffish. I think this term needs to be re-evaluated. We could all learn a thing or two about confidence, love, and joy by being more like a cat. I, for one, am going to use her as a personal example more often. I encourage the reader to do the same.

Love fully. Sing loudly. Dance wildly. Make noise. Do the things you enjoy and don't let yourself be bothered with who is watching or what they are thinking. Do things just because they feel good. Play! Give your love and friendship away to everyone, you wont run out. Tell people when you need them, but don't be too pushy if they don't have time for you at the moment. They will come around and if they don't, you know you didn't waste too much time on trying to get them to. Ask for what you want. Don't expect people to just know. Be understanding and persistent but kind when someone doesn't exactly "speak your language". Be passionate. Be bold. Be whatever you are, but be the best you. Don't just be a cat, be a lion.

Flying Off The Handle, and A New Blog

Sorry I flew off the handle in my previous post. I really did accidentally delete my entire blog. I nearly gave up on this blog altogether. There were posts on here from as far back as 4-5 years ago (or earlier), and a lot of them were not backed up. I will be starting over fresh and new (kind of liberating, really).. I will be posting old blogs in here as I come across them. I do have some things saved in various places.

But for now, I would like to welcome you to my new blog. I hope you enjoy it.

Monday, May 11, 2009